Introduction

This year I really wanted to be able to keep our friends and family in the loop as most of them are lost and i'm tired of the ignorant comments.  So here is the short of it, we have 2 sons.  Tristen is 3, he is our very outgoing and loving little man.  And we have Phoenix our little miracle boy who is almost 15 months.  Tristens pregnancy was uneventful for the most part, I went into PTL with him but they stopped it at 29 weeks and didn't think anything of it.  I had him a week early because the klutz that I am broke my ankle at 39 weeks pregnant and had to have a c/s to get him delivered so I could have my ankle operated on.  Not the best start.  Then we started to try again and we lost a baby at 12 weeks...we both knew things were not right and accepted the loss with heavy hearts and a brighter future. 3 months later I became pregnant again and at 5 weeks were told me lost another one.  It went on to prove that I had a SCH (blood clot next to the placenta) was put on light duty and monitored.  At 20 weeks everything was fine then a week later I was told that I have IC, so I got an emergent cerclage and placed on strict bed rest.  Mind you at this time I had a 1 year old running around also.  Luckily we had some wonderful family that helped us through this. At 29 weeks I started to have contractions and bleeding so I drove myself to the hospital at 4:30am while my mom was at home with Tristen and Tim my husband was 3 hours away working out of town.  I couldn't reach Tim and my mom couldn't find somebody to watch Tristen so I was alone and scared and delivered Phoenix at 7:30 am on Tuesday October 20th 2009 without anybody I loved there.  I remember hearing his little cry and getting to kiss my little man before they took him to the NICU.  15 mins later my mom arrived and Tim.  Till this day I'm not allowed to talk to Tim about the birth he is bitter that I didn't call him first thing when I knew something was wrong.   So maybe this turned into the long version.....P was born weighing in at  a whopping 3lbs 7oz and I think 16" long, 11 weeks early.  He had an ultrasound done of his head to check for bleeding and we were told he has PVL (Periventricular leukomalacia) dead white matter in the brain.  And that sometimes it leads to cerebral palsy, and stiff limbs but the outlook was hopeful.  After 54 days in the NICU we were able to take him home on Dec 11th 2 weeks before Christmas.  Had some hiccups along the way but we made it out the other end.

So now today at 15 months old Phoenix is definitely delayed and showing strong signs of CP.  He cannot sit, only rolls over one side, high tone in his arms and weak core muscles.  He has PT and OT once a week for an hour and Speech every other week for an hour.

Some days I just find it so hard to get through with an open mind.  I'm hoping by posting on here that I can get things out, and have another method of thinking things through all the while keeping those of you that are close to us in the loop.  We have found such wonderful support over the last year, and i'm looking forward to the advances that our little boy will make this year.

Here are my pride and joys...