A mish mosh of everything

As I was sitting outside tonight talking with Tim I got to see my first lightning bugs of the season.  For me they are the signs that its summer.  Yes it is still probably close to eighty out ( or at least feels like it) but it felt wonderful.  I love sitting out on my porch surrounded by farmland, listing to the quiet and just being thankful for what I've got.

Lately I keep thinking that Phoenix is 20 months old and still not able to sit, roll, talk, walk anything that I imagined my little man doing at this age.  Its always what if, what if he was born to term, what if I went to the hospital earlier...would he be walking around running after his big brother, and hanging on my legs?  Instead my days are filled with therapy appointments, constant stimulation, trying to figure out what his screaming tantrums mean and trying to keep his happy and busy.  All the while trying to keep a almost 4 yr old entertained and loved at the same time.  Now that its getting warmer out, all Phoenix can do is just sit outside and watch what his brother is doing....not able to join in.  Its been super hard lately cause all he does is scream at me all day long.  I give him a toy, play with him, change him to his walker, exersaucer, stability chair, walk around with him, belly time...and this all in 30 mins and he is screaming again.  I can tell he is frustrated, and just can't do the things he wants to do.  His body is holding him back and he just yells.  Four hours of therapy a week, and then all the work I do with him and still here we are with not much improvement.

So anyway this post was supose to be about our mini vacation to DC and what a wonderful time we had, but it got hijacked.  We did have a half decent time, but i'm thinking we will wait till the boys are at least 3-5 years older till we do anything like that again.  Too much whining!

On the Tristen front, we are done with day 2 of potty training and its going better then I would have thought.  He has struggled with a constipation issue since he was one so doctor's orders were to wait a while till we thought he was in a good spot to start.  Hence him being almost 4 and still in diapers.  We got the all clear and this week with the ungodly heat thought it would be great for stripping to the skivvies.  Today he went all day with no pee pee accidents and had actually pooped on the potty, just to have 3 blow-outs in a row after.  But I'm being really patient with him, and giving him all the high fives, hugs and encouragements that I can to keep him going.  Yesterday it was funny...he was sitting on the potty telling his diddo ( tristen slag for wang) to "Just go pee pee already!" With hand movements and all. 

So sorry for all the jumps from one thing to another, I feel better now, and I'm one pround mama.



Me and my boys..Tristen being silly, and Phoenix just being his cute little self.




The capitol, the clouds looked so neat that night.